I do enjoy a good Zombie Flash!
Confessions of a Stuffed Olive is running a flash fiction comp and it's about Zombies but with a twist; it has to contain humour, whether dark, dry or laugh out loud. Eek. Tough challenge but here's my entry. Oh and you have to do it in a minimum of 250 words.
“What’s funny about zombies? They eat brains, rip your guts out.” Fiona stared around the bemused faces of the boardroom. “Being eaten alive is not funny and you want to use them in a TV show?”
“Exactly. We’ll show the world zombies are not scary. Think of the ratings.” Excited murmurings continued round the table. “It’s not their fault they've mutated into zombies. They can be famous. Everyone wants to be famous.” Fiona’s chair toppled over in her urgency to leave the crazy meeting; she didn't mind slamming the door either, hearing mutterings of failed promotion behind her. They were buffoons; morons if they thought a bunch of brain eating zombies were going to make a ratings winner.
“Any ideas on the best way to use the zombies?” continued Tony as the doors opened with a rotting hand curling around the frame, flesh dripping from the bone. The groaning for brains grew louder, smelling fresh blood. Cries and agonizing screams filled the room as the board now knew what it was like to be eaten alive.
A gun shot rang out, another and another; the noise deafening, the stench vomit educing. It didn't take Fiona long to dispatch the zombies but she could still hear groaning; Tony, his throat ripped out and his guts hanging just like Fiona had described.
“Not so funny now eh?” Coolly, she shot him, sat in his chair and picked up his phone.
“Get me cleaning and Joan Collins.” Promotion just got easier.
248 (excluding title)